Wednesday, 4 October 2017

hell month

this is me, hiding out in this blog and avoiding responsibilities for the next ten minutes.


so many things to talk about, let's make a list (as i love doing)


i hate writing poems.

when i joined creative writing, poetry was completely out of my spectrum. to me, poetry either rhymes, is a limerick, or sounds pretentious. the last part, mostly, nowadays at least. i can't for the life of me write something without the need to rhyme it. also years of shakespeare in my teens have left me with a hankering to constantly write limericks because it goes with my "neh neh neh neh neh tbbbbbbth" personality. so when we had to do an in-class poetry activity, i naturally had to divert all of my sarcasm juices into it, else i wouldn't be able to write a single word. like that spongebob mocking meme, i wrote a really long piece of garbage that people found funny. my table mates had some really pleasant things, so naturally my shit stuck out. i don't know, being deep has lost all meaning to me (thanks, millenials!) and writing poetry to me feels like i'm being pretentious (thanks tumblr poets!) at least i'm glad my teacher sorta shares my views on that. makes the mod easier.

also when one girl said she was overloading on AUs i thought she was taking like 22 or something but she was taking 19. i've taken 18-19 since entering uni (that's an ADM average so) so even with taking 19 my other adm tablemate and i slept at 6 and still attended the 9:30am class. NO EXCUSES!


film is hard. like, really hard.

i have no passion to write (ref. to point 01) so scriptwriting sucks [the life out of me]. but for the gpa i will sacrifice. maybe it's because i'm largely visual. or maybe it's because i'm restless and my constant pacing stops me from sitting at a desk to type an 8 page script. or maybe it's because i ramble and can't keep my thoughts together. i mean i've got pages of ideas but jesus, how hard is it to stay still and write, right? 

also being a producer SUCKS. especially when we keep getting rejected for film locations. i am panicking like fuck man, the shoot was supposed to be on monday but our location decided that after agreeing to let us film, that they f o r g o t that "we have stock-checking and basically fuck you". now we have got no location :-) at least our prof let us skip lesson on monday to film. but this wouldn't have happened if the store had just kept their word. knn.


i have no time for anything

i have backlogged about 6 weeks of forensic science lectures. i haven't exercised in vvvvv long. i have an online mod due sunday that i have to complete by tonight. our shoots are 4 days in a row. haven't done my call sheets. have eaten mee goreng multiple days in a row. my skin is terrible now and i feel like puking because my period hasn't come yet and it might come during shoot.

wow fun.
where is the recess in recess week
die la
(is this poetry? HAHAHAHA)

- your pal

Tuesday, 15 August 2017

daytime horror show part 01

another little project but this time makeup was done by some seniors. the blush is so gorgeous but the back of the tin was so faded but the assumption is that it's from sephora. oh well, swatch swatch away. this was the only digital photo, the rest are on a roll that hasn't finished yet so it'll take a while. but i got my july's pay so at least i wont cry as i send it to be developed in the shop.

today was the 2nd day of school. yesterday we got a free book from the prof called "101 things i learned in film school". seems useful, probably should get to reading it soon. today we had "writing for film" and we had to come up with a story. i pitched a "half true" story because there're two people from hall who may or may not end up finding out who i'm referring to (probably not though they're not close to the person) but nonetheless precautions!!!! but the teacher was more or less okay with it and it seems possible to compress it to a 6-8 page script so i guess i'm doing okay? by right tomorrow i have forensics but it starts in week 2. i cant wait!!!!i fucken LOVE forensic science im so excited omffffffg. and korean 1 starts next monday too with some pals. here's hoping the sem will go great~~~~ all that's left is to get into mj (hip hop dance crew) and to decide on whether to join jcrc (hall main committee) or not.

now to get to doing my homework and planning for the pageant photoshoot wew good sem so far 

Saturday, 15 July 2017

this kid's first film

first time making a video. it was extremely painful. legs are now two-toned, left arm muscles are hard and contracted still, and there's a really ugly bruise on the thigh. also, first time with a sunburn, was not pleasant. you know what else isn't pleasant? watching the video again. and again. and hating it more. and more. i don't know what it is - scratch that, i actually do. it's that some of the shots didn't come out the way i'd wanted them to, and only 2 out of the 4 scenes came out close to the vision. and of course the music was great and fit in with the vibe (junsu's "flower") but the, could be a lot better. but there's no way in hell we can reshoot with the time constraints. just can't wait for both orientation camps to be over and done with so i can get back to crying over my gpa :-) but question is - do i put this video in my folio or not? i mean the slo-mo salvaged the footage since my hands shake like someone with parkinsons (it's not a joke by the way, i was using a stabiliser and it was still super shaky) sooOOoOOo ???????

is this what artists/creators experience often? like dissatisfaction to the point of hating their work? because i'm starting to miss the days of testpapers and facts where all i had to do was find the way to the answer and dassit haiyo

Thursday, 22 June 2017


okay this is the first since my first breath was in chennai, why not post pics about it in my first post? let's see how long this blog lasts lol. not to mention, there's a backlog of old posts on wordpress that i really want to re-upload onto here.

not many photos managed to be tooken over there because it was a 5 day trip jam packed with activities. so much so that i lost 1kg in 5 days which i couldn't lose in a month. but here're some pics that i thought came out really nice and, as yueh nyng would say, "aesthetiCCccCCcCCcccCCCccc".

stinks that this beach is the only getaway they have from prying eyes since having a bf/gf is still quite a touchy subject even in 2017. which, when you think about it, makes like 0 sense because every indian parent wants their child to hurry up and get married then how can they consciously prevent them from dating? bruHhHHhh what is this catch-22

my second favourite shot of them all, after the one with the guy walking past the camera. there's something so soothing about the cohesive colour scheme from the beach to the horses to the girl's skin to her outfit. i'd describe it as majestic ~~~~

then there's this little gem which i caught that really looked like that "you never walk alone" album by bts.
okay it actually isn't that similar but at first glance doesn't it look kinda sorta similar?

we didn't get to do much. this trip was mainly for visiting my grandmother and going for a wedding. shopping was, uh, pretty uneventful. i must say that levi's actually isn't cheaper there at all, in fact i think it's cheaper here probably because of lesser import taxes. but aren't levi's in india made domestically? i mean, $90 for jeans there? nah, i'll just get them here for $70 in the style i actually want haha. i also managed to see some really nice places that are worth photographing/filming at, the beach above included. but it was kinda sad to see how a country that was once filthy stinking rich in terms of wealth and culture has been reduced to an impoverished third world country with great financial + gender inequality, little work ethic and motivation to improve the current conditions and lack of morals like respect. i guess that's what years of robbing and plundering'll do. (not-so-fun fact: india's wealth was depleted well before the colonisation of the brits) maybe in time, things'll get better and it'll go back to it's initial splendour. til then we'll always have the charms of uh, the underdevelopment and unstable infrastructure that make it today's india. don't get me wrong, i don't hate the country and neither do i think it's a dump or entirely bad. i just wouldn't be able to live there in peace, and i mean c'mon it could do with a lot of improvement soOoO there's that.

before i end this post, here's a parting quote from my aunt: 

நன்றி வணக்கம்.